My weekends are always packed with tuitions..so supposed to have 3 tuitions and one cancelled...so i finished my tuitions at 4pm and went down to Somerset Midpoint..i nid to pay up for my balance of my facials and a slimming session promotion..but before that, i called Boon and Ginny and see if they wanna go ktv with mi..Haiz..i tot Ginny might dua mi again coz of TS so i called Boon but in the end, both can make it and Boon decided not to come..i felt very bad so i told him tat i can mit him and Moses later after my ktv...yeah happy ending ;P
So i went to settle my bills and i sat at the info counter waiting for my beautician to come..then there was this lady who came along and sat beside mi..tink she juz finished her session...ok so my beautician saw mi and greeted mi...told her cashier colleague that i am here to pay up for my balance and slimming session..the moment she say slimming, the auntie ( the lady) turned and look at mi ..from up to down lor...so rude! stupid auntie! dunno she looked at mi for wat..so i turned and stared at her..then she looked away..i paid my bills with NETs and so while waiting for my receipt, the auntie was also going to pay up..then she suddenly flashed her 'Gold card' ..wah ..the way she do it was like trying to 'hao lian' to mi lor..then the cashier say sorry only above $100 then can pay by visa.. so she say nvm i pay cash! disgusting...trying to show off that she is richer like tat...wearing shorts and addidas top may look a bit casual but i am definitely not poor lor...idiot!maybe i am too sensitive but u juz didnt saw how she was looking at mi with her card in her hand..feel like telling her: 'u go so many sessions oso no point lar..may as well save up the money and buy bird nest..might have better effects for u!' so anyway...i juz walked off lar..cant be bothered with her oso...
I tink i really wear too casual liaoz..in a white addidas top and surf shorts and sandals..not the normal outfit pple will wear to town but i didnt actually expect myself to stay long there until Gin confirm with mi that we are going ktv lor..haiz..so i was walking along Somerset somewhere along Citibank where they have roadshows..got this guy, another idiot..he was giving out pamphlets to pple along the streets but when he saw mi approaching then he juz kept the pamphlets..i wasnt dying to take the pamphlets but it was in my mind to get a credit card anyway...damn pissed off...like i dun haf money to support...another guy approached mi and ask if i am interested and i replied in front of the one who ignored mi, " Let's talk" and he was completely stunned..haha shld haf taken a pic of his stunned look... so i was made the introduction and tot it wasnt tat bad..so might be considering to get one...
Went ktv with GInny and TS...like a super big lightbulb...haiz..but wat to do when i wan to se Ginny badly...but itz really nice to see TS dotes on her...he bought her a diamond pendant diamond bracelet...close to $700...envy her coz i nv had a bf who would spend so much on mi and buy her watever she likes..i am not materialistic nor do i yearn for all these expensive gifts from my bf..juz tat i nv had a bf who really loves mi as much as TS loves Ginny..the two of them are really loving lar anyway...muz se each other 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week..haha..super glue!! Anyway, i am glad my best fren has found a guy who loves her as much as she love him...though i dun haf a very good impression of him but as long as he treats her well, loves her and dotes on her, care for her...i would pray for Ginny and TS.. I am happy as long as she is well and happy...
After ktv, then i met Boon and Moses...haha nv failed to luff until stomach cramp when these 2 chaps are arnd...Boon was driving so they came Somerset to pick mi...Boon bought mi so fragrant candles from Bangkok...hehe so sweet of him...thanks Boon! then we went to Siglap Gelare cafe and i had a banana smoothie, Boon had Ice tea and Moses had a chocolate thickshakes...we ordered a large waffle with Rum and Raisin Ice cream..haha my fav ice cream....nice but ice cream too little liaoz..then Derek and Lawrence wanted to come and join us.. So we went to Bedok Nth 85 to eat supper...My fav place for supper..these guys can really eat..ordered Fried Carrot cake, Oyster Omelete, chicken wings and Ngo Heung...nice food..was damn full when we left..by the way, we saw Cynthia there too...she was with her frens...so dropped by and say hi...Mi and Boon was tired and we got to work tmr morning...so we left first and My nice Mr Boon drove mi home..was so worried that he dunno the way home lar..cant even read signboards...haiz!! Air Force Capt somemore...lousy topo skills...haha
Hehe busy nite for mi yeah...time to mit up with my frens whom i haven seen for long..this friday going to mit my ME gang during my FYP...Chris, Kit, Keat,Lionel and Wai Kit...dunno Wei SHing coming or not...hope he can come..haven seen him for a long time le..
thinkin' of you at ... 7:32 PM
Yeah..saturday again...today got tuition at 930am..woke up too late to catch the bus and so i took a cab..the cabby driver got lotsa complaints about Singapore govt which is quite true of some of the comments he made...like increasing taxes and working hours but not our pay and bonuses?? itz up to an individual to think abt it..but i am neutral in my stand..i dun tink our govt is exceptionally good but at least we live in peace though very hectic lifestyles...so finish my tuition and went for another one with Bingwen..guess i was too fierce to my boy...i am too tired to gif tuition and nowadays, i am losing my temper very easily...trying very hard to curb my temper now..so went home and rest...listening to the new cd i bought by Gigi Leung..nice songs she got...then went to mit Tingfang and her bf Gek kia..haven these 2 fellas in a million years..so glad to see them!! chatted for a while then i got to go off to mit my fren Eric..he is a fren i got to noe on Nightlife.sg and i saw him at NYDC at wheelock place and so from there, got to noe each other better thru sms..so tat nite was the first time i saw him and tok to him face to face...quite a funny chap i tink...at first, we wanted to go Fisherman Village then i asked him where is Altivo as that is the place he originally suggested...then he told mi it was at Mt Faber so i wanted to go since i nv been there...heard of its nice nite view so we went there instead...Yup..itz a nice place to chill out...not rowdy and crowded...nice place..next time, muz ask Ginny, June and Baoling to go...haha so I had a Purple Haze and he had 2 tiger beers...ordered Nachos and we ate while we chatted...he is very knowledgeable! noe a lot of clubs arnd Singapore...noe where to shop in Bangkok..i haven been to Bangkok and i heard itz a shopping paradise for cheap and good stuff...guess itz time to make a getaway trip!so we went off at 2 plus and i reached home at arnd 3...spent my whole day with drinks!! going to grow fat liaoz... =(
thinkin' of you at ... 7:17 PM
Today is the day when i first saw the world and had my first cry...My bdae!so itz an impt day to mi rite...but as i mention in my previous blog, i am always unhappy coz i dun spend it with the person i love most..most of the time, i am Gin or i am alone or I will celebrate with my family...my mummy always make it a point to celebrate my bdae...she remembered that i ask her for abalone mian xian and ice cream cake and red eggs...hehe so sweet of my mummy...i love my Mummy...
I had to go to work as usual, no time off..receive some greeting msgs from my frens and thanks alot!!thanks for remembering my bdae and make it a point to wish mi..Ced oso msg mi happy birthday...today lunch was at East coast Lemongrass thai restuarant..the food was great and so was the bill! the total for 3 tables was S$749.40...oh my god...we had some starters, then pineapple rice and 6 to 7 main dishes with chicken, beef, fish and tofu...it tastes great and i was damn full after tat...as u noe, gals always have two stomachs..one for main course and the other for dessert of coz!haha...we drove back to office at 2 plus and i went for my production meeting starting at 2pm and ended around 430..went to the test cell and look for my technicians...hehe again i got greetings from them too!! then waited for Sze hao to finish his work and we left at 6plus ..drop mi at tiong bahru mrt stat and i went to City hall and waited for Desmond..he was going to meet mi for dinner..i didnt tot that he wld noe itz my bdae..so we went to a restuarant at Millenia Walk...itz called Moonfish ...the Seafood Spagethi was really goood!!give full marks! Desmond had a fish and chicken combo...then suddenly while chatting, he asked mi if i had any cake today...then i realize that he do noe it was my bdae today...bought mi a slice of cake as a simple celebration...Thanks Desmond..i appreciated that greatly...dinner was great..then chatted a while before we had the bill.need to rush home to celebrate with my mummy mar...then we walk to the fountain and sat there chatting for a while again..he wanted to go down and walk on the platform towards the fountain..i wasnt tat interested and i am tired too...so we sat for awhile before we headed to the mrt station...i went home and bathe ...then mummy cook my mian xian and prepared my cake..hehe got my family to sing bdae songs for mi...i made a wish: I hope all my dreams and wishes will come true...
Time to go to bed..good nitez!
thinkin' of you at ... 2:26 PM
Normal day at work as usual..I managed to catch Terrence online in msn and chatted with him for awhile..he was flying off to hongkong and san francisco this afternoon and he came back from a flight last nite...working doubly hard now and his schedules are jammed packed...so hard to see him at all!!! he thinned down alot and i hope he will take care and eat more coz he look even better before he thinned down..talked to June sometime before i went for lunch and so i was complaining to her abt Ginny but she say Gin would call mi today and asked mi to tok things out with her...see how it goes then...i quite stressed over SolidWorks, a software used to create 3D modelling for tools and fixtures...so hard to draw!!!haiz got to re sketch and re take all my measurements as most of them dun tally due to the poor instruments used!!Then lunch was ok as usual with my lunch kakis...after tat spend the whole day in the workshop doing my sketching and measuring...went off at around 545pm with Siew Wei and took bus 51 to bugis coz he wanna see the new National Library...the library is really fantastic..the design and infrastructure was brilliant..i didnt go with him coz got tuition with my student, Sinhui but could see building from her hse...muz find one day go and explore the library...we went to eat laksa and then chatted awhile..went for my tuition and Ginny called...June, u are rite!she called mi today..hehe luckily she called mi..if not, i wun call her at all..took a cab and went to Tanjong Katong to pick her up and went to our fav haunt, ECP..bought some drinks and chicken wings...spend our time chatting again...Ginny is a fren whom i can feel comfortable even if the both of us are silent...tatz y i treasure her so much..she means more impt to mi than anything else in this world...hope our friendship will nv end...so she bought mi some slimming coffee from Xando coz i kip saying i am growing fat and she didnt noe wat to buy for mi either....thanks Babe!Gave mi a hug before she went back home.. the taxi driver was terrible!he practically slows down when he approach a traffic light..when he could haf juz accelerate and save mi the waiting time..the rd home was particularly full of traffic lights! he still can tell mi that he was rushing to Simei...felt like telling him to step on it and shut up...idiot! i really think that taxi drivers who doesnt noe the road well shld inform the passengers so we wun waste precious time...if i ended up wasting time taking a cab and taking detours here and there, then y the hell am i taking a CAB????haiz..got back home and bathe...saw three bdae msgs from Jiawei, Wee and Eric...these guys are really nice and sweet of them to remember my bdae..thanks!tmr got Production Meeting, Lunch treat from staff who were promoted @ Lemongrass Thai Restuarant -ECP..yippie...lunch will be longer..i am taking the car with David,Director of Engineering and my mentor of coz...anyway congrats to everyone who got promoted in this July!i hope i will be promoted soon!!hahahaha =)
thinkin' of you at ... 3:40 PM
Today is a bad day at work...An engine was ready to go for testing and therefore i am supposed to raise test instructions to the testers like wat to test and wat to look out for...juz formality coz the testers noe the engine more than i noe my mum and dad! so anyway, i was supposed to let my supervisor/mentor to have a look at it before issuing out..he made mi change and change...i noe he is a perfectionist and we are going to bill the customer based on the testing done..so everything muz be precise and accurate..i was abt to go for a final build meeting and i am meeting the customer rep at 430...his changes to my test instructions was making mi fustrated coz i didnt wan the customer to wait and by the way, he can be really nasty if he was to wait for the engineer...so my mentor went to look for an engine file which i didnt manage to find earlier..i went down for the meeting and my mentor came down shortly after tat..he gave a glum look and say the file was in the archive room...i swear i search the whole place upside down and i couldnt find the file..oh...i guess he will have a bad impression of mi now as being careless...the customer rep was asking if we can push out more engines..my mentor remembered abt my base visit the other day and ask mi if they have technical probs...the thing is, it was my first visit...oreadi so nervous meeting new people and first time to the base as an engineer...i really dunno wat to ask them...the only tech prob they have is they are not allowed to strip the engine and repair..the repair engineers from the base only showed mi several engines waiting to come to STA as investigation engines...haiz 3 more coming in next month...all investigation and i am supposed to lead it with my mentor...hopefully, all can pass test and dun gif mi big probs...stressed!i hope it doesnt affect my probation performance...muz work doubly hard! better sleep early to be more alert tmr...nitez!
thinkin' of you at ... 1:55 PM
Yesterday went mdm wong with June,Vanessa and also Desmond with some of his frens..quite a fun nite with June though coz she very 'on' when we were dancing to our favourite dance mix..So both got to noe Desmond and both agree that he is cute!haha but i find him ok lar..not too bad.. :p so anyway June had a wager with mi tat she is supposed to go and get a guy hp number if both of us agree that he is cute ( we are not playgals!!just for the fun of it only..) tat gal dun really dare to go so tatz y she is fun to tease..but then she like a bit overdoing it lar..Gal, do u realize that u kip looking at that 'cute guy'???itz damn obvious lar...aiyoh in the end, we didnt go and get coz we find him a bit 'poser' seh ...so didnt wan to get his number...i dunno what the hell was my June thinking..when Desmond was talking to her, she kip telling lies to almost all the questions he asked...haiz..dunno lehz..just find tat maybe u lie for one or two is ok lar...but when u do it for every question, it makes people hard to tok to u and they dunno when they shld believe u...itz juz my own view..maybe others find it ok but to mi, if i am Desmond, i wouldnt be bothered to tok anymore...anyway, other than tat, it was truly fun to club with this best buddy of mine!
Today wake up early for tuition and i was quite late oso..but i am always late for every appointment..i tink i am domineering..i can make people wait for mi but i cannot wait for people...i juz dun haf the patience to wait...make mi wait 5 mins and i will juz blow up!tink i better go fishing to train my patience..could be due to my busy schedule tat i find my time very precious...sorry not saying that ur time is not precious but people who noe mi do noe how packed and busy my schedule can get...I finished up my tuition and went to Orchard Midpoint for a spa and facial session..it was supposed to be a free trial session becoz i bought some facial and diet stuff from Josephine cosmetics and then became a member...the spa was called 21st Century Spa...very good service...but nothing comes really free coz after my beautician tells mi what my free package are, i quickly changed to other more value-added beauty packages...so i did a better facial and i haf to top up $40 for it, detox hydrotherapy is just hot water and some essence oil..so i changed it for a milk bath at an addition of $5...the facial was ok but time consuming..will be going back next week for eye treatment,facial and slimming session..try out and see if it really works...haha..it will be close to 250bucks for that sessions...the spa was alright but i prefer those with natural surroundings...those tat u see in television...looks really good...tat one at 21st Century was not tat impressive though..but anyway this is my first time to spa..once i am getting a stable income, i wan to get a spa membership and a car..haha juz looking arnd which spas are nice...any recommendations?do let mi if u have it....
Then i really needed my atm card back as i left it with Baoling the other day and now itz with Ginny..so i went to Kembangan and waited for 45mins for her to finish up the tuition and pass mi my stuff...initially i tot she might be free to mit up longer..until she told mi tat she needs to go and mit Ts..wa liaoz...i was really boiling then..my fustration today mainly comes from her....ever since Ts is back, she practically mits him everyday and she always have time for Ts but not for mi...everytime her excuse for not miting mi is always TS..i have come to hate him lor coz he is so possessive...everyday muz mit...anyway he hates mi too coz gin sometimes make him feels tat i am more impt than him...well, he wins all the time now..i dun wan to make things difficult for her but then she doesnt really care whether i am there for her anymore..seems like as long as Ts is there, she will be fine...she even took out the pendant tat i bought for her Bdae..it had her name engraved on it and i had a similar one too...i bought it for her and myself...i was very sad and disappointed that she took it out becoz Ts bought her a new pendant..start to tink tat our freindship is wobbling..so much for frens forever...when she need mi, i am always there, but when i need her, i only hear her voice and dun see her at all...the time when i went to ECP alone, i half expected her to be there for mi but when she told mi TS is coming, i told her i will be fine alone...i mean how would u feel if u feeling really upset and ur fren come along wif another fella and say he will sit one side n not eavesdrop????? the problem is i juz wan someone by my side..u dun haf to say anything, juz sit down and be quiet..or maybe some girls' talk if i wan to say anything but y the hell muz Ts follow???and he cannot be more 'auto' a bit and say he wun tag along....obviously i was really feeling very upset tatz y gin is coming and he, a bloody idiot, dun understand at all!she always tell mi tat she is juz playing along and wun be with him for long...juz wan to spend his money but from wat i see, she really loves him alot to the extent of seeing him everyday...she wun be able to gif up that easily...anyway i dun see the point of being there for her everytime she needs..the person she needs is not mi but Ts...i cant help but feel sad abt wat she is doing to mi....itz very hurting for someone whom u treat even better than anyone is doing this to u...celebrate my bdae with mi at ktv for 1-2 hours then the couple has to go off coz their anniversry oso on the same day as my bdae...watz the point??? i dun nid her to celebrate my bdae....things are not the same anymore.....i really hate it to happen....
thinkin' of you at ... 2:59 PM
16th July
Oh yah...forgot to record this in my blogs...how could i haf miss it??on the 16th July, it was the wedding of my fren, Qing Yi and his wife, Ting Hui..a great match made in heaven...Thnx for inviting mi to the wedding..i am so glad i went to the wedding dinner in the end..something cropped up and i tot i cant make it to the dinner..so i wanted to ask my frens help mi gif him a red packet first but none wants to help and kip insisted mi to go..anyway i actually intended to go to the dinner as i went to buy a black dress and high heels..haha spent close to 200 bucks..but it looks really good i tink...then something unexpected cropped up and by the time i was free, itz already 7 plus..my parents wanted mi to go as they sya itz not very nice not to turn up when u are being cordially invited...so i decide to rush down and manage to reach there at arnd 8 plus...by the time i reached, the bride was walking down the aisle towards the bridegroom with her dad by her side..it was quite touching to see that scene actually..i am happy and glad for her to find her own happiness..though i dunno her but i wish her all the best yah! so we started the dinner and i sat beside JP ..kind of find him very childish and crude...i dun understand how did i fall for him in the first place..anyway itz all in the past and i am glad we are just frens and nothing else..this guy dunno how to respect girls and male chauvinistic..lotsa bad points..( i hope he doesnt visit my blogs!!) i muz haf been blind in the past..anyway eric was by my side and around the table 33, we haf James and his gf,Johnny, Alex and Xiuwei and his gf, Joy..it was a very fun nite as Qing Yi put our table as the last to toast and we got fed up so muz forfeit him..we pour a BIG glass of white wine and made him finish up!Mr Eric, our good old bro, tried to help him block the drinks and got himself quite drunk..but i muz say Eric and Alex hold their liquor well!!i had a few glasses of wine too...rather drunk then coz i am not a very good drinker..towards the end of the party, Xiuwei really cannot make it..he slammed my head like he was playing basketball lor and itz really hard lehz...but i din gif him a good time either...it was fun...really fun...wun ever forget tat nite..they will definitely be in my list when i am going to have my wedding dinner!hahaha long time to go manz...anyway, since the nite was still quite young, i msg Desmond and ask if he wanna drop by Mdm Wong...there was only two of us coz his fren last min cannot make it..though only two of us, it was quite fun...coz i see alot of girls staring and standing near him...cute guy mar...wat to do???we danced til late nite 230am and went home after tat coz he needs to be up early in the morning for a youth performance...so this is the happy event that i wan it recorded in my diary...
19th July,
I am a happier person now..i met up with June last nite for dinner and she cheers mi up...our telepathy was still incredible and hard to believe..she always noe wat i wan to hear and say...i love her so much! haha..i should have let go of him long time ago...maybe i knew tat this day would come and i didnt gif myself too much hope...itz easier for mi to accept the failed relationships...i am glad i am a stronger person now..in fact, i am enjoying wat i am having now..i no longer have to wait for msgs and calls, worried abt where is he and wat he is doing...tink of him whether does he miss mi at the point when i am missing him..i dun haf to change my tuitions to match his time table...everything is free and easy...itz like the feeling of freedom after being suppressed for a long time...i am glad i can let go of him so easily...although we are not together anymore, i once loved this man and nv regretted anything abt him..as long as he is happy and healthy, i guess tatz wat i wan for the person i used to have feelings for..i do hope he will stay happily with the one he loves..itz hard to be frens coz we were nv frens in the first place..nonetheless, i still wish him all the best..itz always better to look forward than dwelling with the unhappy past...forget the past, live with the present and hope for the better future!!
Qing Yi, I wish u and ur wife eternal marital bliss and stay happily forever like the prince and princess in fairy tales..most imptly, when am i going to get red eggs ar???hahaha
thinkin' of you at ... 9:59 PM
Finally everything has come to an end between mi and Ced..I went to East Coast park alone and sat there from 430 till nite time...tot thru the things between mi and him..all the mysteries came to light...i got the answers to all my doubts abt him...looking at the sea can relieve mi of the sadness..i cried but i told myself this will be last time i am crying for him..after i stepped out of east coast, he will be history to mi...luckily i have a new fren, Desmond who came to find mi and took mi to dinner when he knew tat i was in ECP...he rides a Scrambler and I have nv taken a Scrambler before so tat was kind of fun....We chatted and his presence really cheers mi up alot..juz find tat he is quite an innocent and decent man...doesnt get touchy at all and he is really a funny chap...i enjoyed his company alot...feel at ease when i am with him..will take a break for relationships nw...but this guy is worth trying out coz i do like him abit...so maybe for now, juz try to be frens first and get to noe him better.. =)
thinkin' of you at ... 1:04 PM
itz time to evaluate my relationship with Ced..or is there a need to evaluate in the first place..i dunno is it becoz of our age gap that we have different views abt how a relationship shld be maintained..if u like a person, i tink u would want to spend time with him/her no matter how busy u are..becoz u like her/him and u wan to see him/her, spend moments together..." live ur life each day as if it is the last" ...this statement spurs a person to work hard at his job as each of us nv noe if we wld still be arnd the next day..kind of pessimistic but isnt life juz as fragile and unpredictable? we shld grab our time and make best use of it...i consider myself to be a blessed person..i have a happy and complete family, no worries abt my food and shelter as my parents are always there to support, i am healthy with many good frens around mi, i am starting to build my career, i have everything i want except a stable relationship..i used to have a bf who loves mi and treat mi really nice..itz my loss for nt treasuring him and let him go...after tat, none of my relationships are stable..i really wan a person to love mi wholeheartedly..have a everlasting relationship, settle down and stay together always..maybe itz the people i met n fell in love with..without the wrong ones, u nv met the right one...i can be very tolerant with my bf..even if he has an affair outside, i can close one eye as long as he admits his mistake and promise nv a next time..tatz how tolerant i can be..doesnt seems to tally with my horoscope, Leo...a horoscope with great personality and pride..Ced claims tat he likes mi but he nv shows it..he can mit mi once every 2-3 weeks and only for one hr plus...i dun have a sense of security abt him and i am always wondering wat is he doing when i am nv arnd..we only tok on the phone and sometimes he MIA for days giving mi the excuse tat he is busy...i guess even LKY has time for his family..he forever dun haf time for mi...he rather stays at home and play games than mit mi..guess i am not a very nice person to be with..does he really stay at home in the first place? a relationship without trust is a goner..Sometimes, i wonder if he will ever realize i am gone the next day..does he even bother if i am missing?Probably he is not the person i am looking for..gives mi the feeling tat he doesnt really like mi ..wat i dun understand is if he doesnt like mi, then y dun be straightforward and tell mi..i prefer straightforward pple..like means like , dun like means dun like...a person shld be responsible for his own feelings and not treat others like toys...when i describe the situations to my close buddies, they analyse tat he doesnt like mi...i am like an on-call taxi, when he calls, i will be there...but if i find him, itz difficult....more difficult than climbing Mt Everest..is there a point to continue with the relationship...itz a question i always ask myself..my ultimatum for him is my bdae...if he can forget it, then i wun tink of him anymore...itz pointless..i am always unhappy on my bdaes since my 21st one..i hate festivals like X'mas and New Yr...i always make myself angry for all these worthless people..like pple always console the others, " u are not losing anything coz u juz lost a person who doesnt love u at all but the other person has lost a person who loves him/her deeply.." i cant believe what he says anymore..not even the things he promised..he is irresponsible, no time management and most of all, he treasures his own freedom too much...probably, tatz y he cant commit to a relationship even at his age...i dun demand him to mit mi everyday or call mi everyday to report what he is doing..basically, i juz feel tat he doesnt care..maybe i am just a little girl to him..i hate him..hate him to the core...i mess up my timetable to fit him, in the end, he will disappoint mi and make mi upset..i dun wan to make my life miserable for a person who doesnt care abt mi...maybe i shld take a break for relationships now...
thinkin' of you at ... 6:49 PM
I juz went to Terrence's online website and learnt about the lawsuit between the CEO of NKF and SPH..i have always been very skeptical abt the donations tat we make to charities and always wonder do they really use the money to help the needy people...Like wat he observes, i feel tat NKF is getting too commercialised...instead of really helping people, they seems to be able to make profits from our donations...from the recent newspaper reports, i guess i noe where does most of our donations go to..the tap that cost $990 and a toilet bowl tat costs another $1100 and people who says that a salary of $ 550k per annum is peanuts??? wow, tink abt tat ..how long can tat yearly salary subsidize for the dialysis fees of the sick people who needs to spend an atrocious sum of money on the medical fees?? i always feel sick when the media corps stars put up shows that 'risk' their lives to make sure donations will come in..Singaporeans are not psychos..we donate not because of the shows but mainly for our deepfelt sympathy for the patients who are suffering mentally,psychologically and financially..the part tat really touch mi is the slide show where they show real life interviews of the sick children and it really hurts to see them struggling to stay alive to fight the illness...tatz the point when i really felt the heartache for their parents and relatives who loves them..
NKF should show more transparency in the way the resources are being utilized in order to gain back the trust and faith from the public who really wants to donate to help the sick..these patients really need help..even a person who owns a gold mine will become bankrupt with the ever-rising medical fees in today's society, not to mention Singapore...
Other than this article i read thru Terrence's website, itz also time to update my diary..today i spent a busy day at work...got 2 engines came in yesterday..lotsa paperwork to be done to ensure that everything is being documented, checked and signed...learnt some operational stuff today rather than reading my training manual...kind of finding it hard to be a female engineer...hard to get the guys to listen to u especially when u are young, inexperience and being a lady, tatz the worst...I wrote my first Engineering Bulletin and was really badly criticized by my Work Engineer..he is very senior and works in the Makila line for more than 30 years...but the thing is, everything i wrote was tailored by my mentor..aiyah find it so hard to please everybody...the EB was already approved , signed and distributed..so i dunno his point of telling mi now instead...i will try not to make the same mistake again...guess tatz the only thing i can do...then my good old colleague, Mr A...he drives mi crazy manz...no doubt he is nice and helpful but toking to him can cause my blood pressure to rise and my blood vessels to explode!i ask him a question and he cant really ans mi the way i expect the answer ..he juz dun get to the point ...after making big rounds, he stil doesnt really tell mi what i wan or need to noe...arghhhh....he doesnt organize his tots when he tok and he craps alot...do a lot of extra things which is not necessary and i ended up asking other engineers like Sze Hao in order to get the full info...Someone help mi pls...my mentor is another super busy man..i cant seem to find him..alot of things i need him to guide but ended up, i got to learn everything by myself...haiz......during a meeting today, my WE actually say that i dun haf to do so much since Song, the engineer will be back next week...OMG..i am there to be an engineer and Song is going to be promoted lor..dun let mi learn now then when?? i feel like telling him tat i am a full time engineer not a temp engineer or secretary lor....wa kaoz....i will work hard and not let them look down on mi! i wan to be the best female engineer there and make sure they follow what i say and not the other way round!
thinkin' of you at ... 9:08 PM
Today marks the day of my commencement day!!Finally a full-fledged graduate of NUS now...Yeah!!after so many years of studies, i guess this is wat everyone of us looks forward to...today still got to go back to office in the morning until 11am..was doing my reading on speed control of the engine..rather tough but at least i had the motivation to absorb everything i read today...tatz great!so jia wei, xiu wei and mi left office and we rushed home to get our gowns...
My parents drove mi to the University Culture Centre where the ceremony is held..then i went to the robing room to get changed...luckily i have Chris there..she helped mi pinned my sash and my robe together and at least i dun look like an idiot..haha but i tink all of us look like Harry Potter without the magic wand!!hahaha quite cute..so my parents were ushered into the auditorium and follwed by the graduands...Becoz of some foolish cock up in the NUS system, i was considered late in my commencment registration and i didnt get to sit with my fellow course mates....my seat was behind the Masters students..so weird...then the ceremony starts and the prize giving ceremony was rather robotic for the presenter...clap until sianz...luckily the chap beside mi is quite friendly and i wasnt that bored...when they start announcing for the 2nd lower honours, my name was skipped becoz itz in alphabetical order..i told the lady usherer behind mi and she say my name will be mention later after row P is out....kaoz...i was damn pissed off lor coz i would be together with the 3rd class honours...then she say nobody will noe what honours i am getting since they nv announced...i was tinking: Everybody noes tat except u lor...haiz..so i was chucked between the 3rd class honours..there was a sudden jump in the alphabetical order and my frens were wondering y i was getting 3rd class...though i am 2nd lower but i am still a class better than 3rd class lor...so infuriating!haiz..then after the ceremony, i took pictures with my daddy and mummy...took a lot of pics with my frens like my ME gang, my Kayak gang , my FYP Lab mates and some other frens in my ME ...smile until my mouth going to cramp liaoz...hahaha..then after the pictures taking, i went for dinner with my Kayak gang, namely Hui Shan, Cai Yun and Ting Ting..went to heeren Lemongrass restuarant....crap a while and after tat, we went to cineleisure and walk walk...oh yah, Terrence was supposed to mit mi for coffee today...msg mi during the Convo ceremony and since i havent seen him for a long time and he is hard to catch so we arranged to mit today..he needs to send his parents to Msia and then come back to Sg to mit mi..took him sometime to get back and by the time we met, it was arnd 1015pm..went to starbucks coffee besides California Fitness and my Kayak frens were there too coz they wanna see how he looks like...haha so they sit arnd for abt 20 mins and they went home...Terrence thinned down alot..was quite surprised to see him so thin now...he has been very busy with his flights schedule..he is an air steward by the way..cute guy!we chatted abt my job and update each other before his fren, Efi came..dunno if i got her name rite..chatted abt Amsterdam and things happening there...quite fun to have Cabin crew as frens coz they can tell u alot abt travelling..another nice surprise from Terrence was he bought mi an Ambercrombie Top...itz very nice and I like it alot....thanks Terrence!i told him sometime ago tat i wanted him to help mi buy some Ambercrombie stuff from the States and there he got mi one as a gift..so sweet of him...I used to like him but then i guess we might be better off being frens coz i noe he doesnt have the chemistry for mi...he is a nice fren..very caring,attentive,listens to my problems, sweet, ambitious as he noes wat he wans in his life, hardworking to strive towards his goals and best of all, a very talented music person...he will make it and i believe he will and he can do it... Jia you! so we left each other at arnd 11plus..wanted to stay longer out with him and his fren but i really quite tired and i got a big meeting tmr morning...a long one too..from 830 to 130pm...so better go home and rest after a long day out...took a cab home and itz time for mi to fill in my blog and go to sleep!
thinkin' of you at ... 2:59 PM
Was supposed to mit Ced on sat and he told mi he cant make it coz he nid to get back to work...not within his expectations that he needed to go back to office that day..i went to Immigration to get my IC replacement and he was supposed to come and fetch mi but when i tried to get him on fri, he MIA so i noe tat he wun mit mi at all...nonetheless, i still had some hope tat he might msg mi in the morning tat he can come and mit mi..but my sixth sense abt him nv failed mi...in the end, all my tuitions were cancelled and i spent the day doing nothing at all..until 4 plus i met ginny for coffee...Went to Dano to get some tops and Wacoal to buy some seamless underwear..i guess people dun look good with the underwear linings when u r wearing pants..then TS, ginny's bf came and we went to Storm hairdressing...was rather tempted by their promotions on hair cut, colour and treatment so i lended some money to Ginny and I borrow from Boon...aiyoh he is my saviour lor..muz treat him to something good when i get my pay check..he is always there for mi when i need him...thanks Boon!then went back home and prepared to go Mdm Wong on sat...the crowd was more at arnd 12 plus and had a hard time getting a place to dance..some fat guys juz kip squeezing in and spend the time toking to their frens instead of dancing..irritating..so got to noe a guy called Desmond..he is quite cute i muz say ..hahaha but i tink he is more interested in my fren Baoling rather than mi..tink he prefers brave gals..she got the number from him anyway...so we chatted for awhile and then he needs to be back with his frens..Gin left us rather early coz she nids to go and mit TS..that TS is terrible lor and Ginny everytime muz go and mit him...dunno what the hell she is tinking lar..tat guy is damn super possessive..mi and Baoling cant stand him liaoz..so mi and Ling went to 85 for supper and went back home at arnd 3 plus..saw a roach in my room when i got home and gave mi a big shock..didnt dare to kill it coz i damn scared of roaches..y arent they extinct!!!!!cant stand them moving arnd in my room!!!!so anyway i am too tired to be bothered by them...
Back to Ced, on sunday, i got 3 tuitions so nv msg him..i called him and msg him after tat and he didnt respond to mi at all...MIA again..today i called him and ask him wat he was doing..all he could say was he slept early..i msg him 7plus in the evening and he told mi he was asleep at 9plus..2 hrs diff and he cant cal mi back??excuses i tink...today call him and he answered..so i say he muz make himself free on 27th Jul...he kip asking mi wat is it...stil can say 'cant be ur bdae rite'...i almost flipped tat instant...he obviously dun remember anything i told him....haiz.....i am so disapppointed with him...everytime when i told him abt things tat i am angry abt such as nt spending enuff time with mi and nt knowing more things abt him, he will juz ignore mi..i am not trying to control him but he is like a mystery to mi...i dunno alot of things abt him and i feel tat he kips alot of things from mi too...it makes mi feel very insecure...then is there any point in continuing any further? itz a question i kip asking myself...in the end, after msging him all the offensive stuff, i cool down and soften..everytime got to pacify him and ask him not to be angry with wat i said juz now..he kinds of take mi granted liao ba..i guess he is tired and i am tired of it too...part of mi wans to give up but part of mi cant bear to do tat coz i still like him alot...what should i do?????
thinkin' of you at ... 1:32 PM
I was on my way home to the mrt station at Eunos..i wanted to finish my cigarette before i board the train..while standing at the entrance of the mrt station, a guy came up to mi and ask if i am smoking alone...i look around mi and was tinking if there was anybody beside mi..obviously i am alone lar..kaoz..ok so i tried to smile and say yah...and he said i look fierce...and i replied saying thatz how i look when i dun smile..ok so he started saying i got the cool icy stare at people and commented abt how cute i look and the way i carry myself..a bit stunned but still nice comments. i smiled back and thank him..so he wanted my hp number and at the same time my photo too using his hp cam...i rejected it and went off after tat...funny fella..i guess he look so much younger than mi...haiz..
On my way home, my friend msg mi and ask if i could mit for dinner...so i agreed and we went to fish and co at bugis..during the train ride to bugis to mit my fren, i msg Ced and told him tat a guy tried to pick mi up and see his reaction but then he nv replied..so i juz went to have dinner with my fren..half way thru the dinner, i took out my hp and saw one missed call from him and a msg...i read the msg and i guess he was rather angry with mi for not answering..when i called him back, he tot i was busy with other guys and tatz y i didnt ans his calls...darling, u too sensitive liaoz...no matter who i am with, i will definitely call u back one..but i really din see his calls mar...anyway, i enjoy the attention he is giving mi now...hehe...at least i am kind of impt to him now...wonder if he had settle his 'problem' or not...after my dinner, i met up with a fren in the train, Ivan...long lost fren..used to be my fellow member in St John Ambulance Bridage..after i got off the train, i called Ced again....still pissed off abt the incident until i explain and then we concluded that it wasnt my fault but itz M1 and Starhub lagging...Stupid telecompany!so we were chatting and this time for longer time..we tok abt 17 mins...he advised mi abt buying cars..my darling very knowledgeable abt cars...my basic criteria for my bf: muz know abt cars, muz love cars,play billiards, club at times and muz be successful in the things he do and most impt big eyes...i tink i tend to like guys with big eyes and no specs...anyway i wanted to get a cheap and good 2nd hand car so my darling offer to help mi analyse my finance and look out for a car with mi once i got enuff cash with mi...i told him abt the guy who wanted to pick mi up and he tell mi dun hao lian..wait till he go clubs and wait for gals to go get his number....then i say ' u dare' ...so he say he nv go clubbing liaoz..now only have mi...so touched to hear tat...even if itz a lie, it stil sounds good...nowadays darling like to stay at home at nite..so if wanna mit oso muz mit day time only...coz tat piggy wanna stay at home at nite...funny for a guy who used to love nite life so much and suddenly prefers to stay at home at nite...i asked him but tatz the only reason he gave...dun like to go out at nite..but anyway i try to accomodate his time...he busy man mar so i try to fit into his timetable...as long as he spends some time with mi, tatz all i am asking for...actually, now i am more like trying to win his heart..i think he doesnt like mi as much as i like him...i tink of him every now and then..tinking if he is too busy with his work , got eat his meals regularly...a lot of things to tink abt him...
thinkin' of you at ... 9:32 PM
5th July
Today was another normal working day...juz wan to record everything that Cedric does in my blogs...he called mi today and say he could mit for lunch...Boy, was i glad to hear this...he got an appointment at 11 and say he will call mi after tat...so i waited for his call...until 1230, i called him and he say he couldnt make it becoz of an idiot who claims that Cedric's workers damage his car and ask for compensation...he got to go down to settle the problem...i so sad that he cant mit mi for lunch..so i went with my colleagues..Sze hao,Su qiang,xiu wei and jia wei..my usual kakis for lunch...went to heartland mall hawker centre...i will nv eat there again...i order Kway Chap ( Duck) ..expensive nvm...but the auntie's attitude was terrible!!!!i die oso dun wan to eat there again..somemore itz not really tat fantastic afterall!!!then after tat went back to office, did some work and measurements for some toolings...rot at the workshop with the technicians...we gonna have our own EBU bbq so doing some planning at the same time...today got EBU run..part of mi wanted to run and part of mi not really willing to run... wan to run coz i wanted to share the kind of bonding that the staff of STA have but dun wan to run coz the air around the place is quite bad...haiz...but cannot everytime siam lor...nxt week muz run liaoz...
On my way home, Ced called and ask mi where am i..so we got engaged into a small tok...u may wonder how come i will record these small little things he does..seems common to every couple..but the thing is i wasnt even sure if we were together...he calls mi 'dear' but i dun haf that feeling that we are a couple..been with him for sometime..we only mit up for lunches and each meeting lasted less than 3 hours..maybe i am very demanding...but if u like a person, then u wun tink that 3 hours is long...not a movie, shopping, billiard, ktv or clubbing...i dunno wat he likes, his fav food or drink, his fav colour and his frens at all????i dunno wat i like abt him..maybe his success in career, the way he toks to mi, the way he carry himself and the way he looks at mi...dunno lar..troublesome thing...i only noe tat if i really feel belonged to one guy, i wun tink of knowing other guys or go clubbing at all...but he responding better to mi now..there was a period of time from Apr to May 05 during my examz, he totally ignored mi...so tatz y i kip mentioning he treats mi better now...i tot i might get over him after i am back from a trip..i enjoy travelling becoz each time i go to a new place, it gave mi strength to forget and start anew again...when he starts to treat mi better, i juz soften and give in again...even june and ginny are tired of mi saying that i will forget him...haiz..but my feelings for him now should be stronger...
then went home today and bought some facial stuff that costs mi $162 and return Boon some money which he lended mi for my grad trip..got home then have dinner and rest by watching TV...had my bird nest desert!hehe mummy's still the best...my parents still love mi the most but the kind of love is different...people say when u dun have love, u have kinship, friendship and other things...but then the feeling of love can nv be replaced by all these things...the feeling of love energized a person, can pull u thru difficult times and brings u to the high and low of ur emotions..though people always say love is not everything but love is definitely something we cant leave without...i am a greedy person coz i wan to be the happiest and luckiest person on earth!
thinkin' of you at ... 11:45 PM
So tired!!!!itz been a busy week for mi..be it at work or at tuitions...last week was my best record...one tuition everyday after work and the only thing i could tink of was my bed..just wan to go to sleep as soon as i reached home....last weekend i got 3 tuitions on Sat and 4 tuitions on Sun...i didnt cancel a single one so it was quite a feat for mi..haha...luckily my students are very understanding..they decide to let mi go on break since their examz are over as well...yeah....finally can haf a good sleep tonite...
Today i wasnt feeling well at work..u noe the girls' thing every mth...my stomach cramps was terrible and when i got to work, i juz feel like going home and rest..i took a painkiller but wasnt good enuff to kill the pain..i ask my supervisor and manager for a half day off..they were very understanding and straight away approved my leave...i wanted to take the afternoon half off as in since i already in office then may as well try to tolerate the pain until lunch time..by 10 plus, i was already feeling better..the painkiller works i tink..so i decide to cancel my off and continue at work..nothing much was accomplished except reading my SOPs and Engineering Documents..got to do a presentation at the end of this month...i tink i better work harder...my darling,Cedric actually wanted to mit mi coz he was at Tamp working on one of his customers as he thought i had a half day off..but i told him i feeling better so i cancel my off..actually wanted to go mit him but i cant just leave the office like tat as i am still on probation and this job matters alot to mi ...he was understanding and say nvm..not as if i am going to run away with someone else...hmm but i am afraid that he will run away..haha ..everytime when i wait for his call, he wun call...then when i didnt expect him to call and nv bring my hp out, he will call...haiz..but nowadays he is more responsive towards my calls and msgs which i am very glad abt it..used to complain tat he doesnt do so in the past..
Then after work, i went to meet up with my uni frens, Chris, Lionel and Choon Kit...itz always nice to hang out with them...we share alot of thoughts today...tok abt our working environment and I am glad all of us found a good job..Choon Kit with Shell, Chris and Lionel in Schlamberger and all of us work as engineers...Mr Choon Kit already tinking of buying a house and getting married liaoz..Chris more like an independent career woman as she isnt planning on marriage that early yet...Lionel tinking of that in 3 years time..as we grow old, our thoughts change...Used to tok abt results,teachers and our frens..now toking abt career and marriage..Marriage, something too far for mi to tink since i dont even haf a steady bf yet...darling still too playful and cant commit to long term relationship or maybe itz me tatz y he cant or dun wan to commit...i am just taking things at a step first..we nv noe wat our future beholds..no point to tink too much either..conc on something that is within my control and tatz my career..i got it planned out ...work hard on Makila first then i will transfer to do commercial engines and take the CAAS test...then maybe transfer to Engineering to do airframes or maybe change a job environment to SIA??Tatz how i am going to plan my career...Hopefully i can save enuff and maybe i am going to start doing my own business...being a boss is still better to work for others i tink...more freedom but more stress...We talked about other things like Choon Kit's irritating colleague, our lab's most BHB guy who always tinks girls like him,my car accident and thoughts of rich people...always a fair exchange of tots and tat makes conversation with them so easy and fun...Too bad, Wei Shing, Wait Kit and Sze Keat not around...if not, i expect even more fun and noise!!haha...waiting for the next round of meeting with them!
Tired and sleepy, my eyes are closing...tatz all for the week and good nitez
thinkin' of you at ... 12:06 AM
I am a simple person,fun loving and hope to live happily everyday and every single moment...
I Like Freedom...
I Hate Hypocrites!! Stay Away from me!!
I always believed that we live our lives to fulfill our dreams and to seek the person we love most on earth and be together forever..
just like Altair and Vega..
I seek for true love on earth but kind of disappointed with this journey as true love seems non-existent...
Everyone of us should live with Dreams..
Itz our Dreams that make us different from all Other Living Creatures..
Itz Our Dreams that Make Our Lives Meaningful and fulfuilled...
Start Your Imagination Wild now..Because Dreaming is Free!
Dare to Dream, Dare To Fail..
Live Your Life The Way You Want It Because It is Your Life ..
We Live Once so Live it To The Max!
.:. My Likes .:.
I Like My Life...
I Like The Seas and Oceans...
I Like BMWs and AirBus 380...
Most Importantly, I Love My family and my close friends who have supported me always ..Never giving me up and be my listeners..
.:. My Hates .:.
I Hate Lecherous Guys!! Be Sorry if you are disrespectful to Gals in front of Me!!
I Hate Brinjals and Cabbages!!
I Hate Flying Cockroaches!!
I Hate Myself Without Dreams and Be Negative!!
*May 2005
*June 2005
*July 2005